I don't often write about my relationship with God. So if you are one of those people who does not have the same beliefs as me or goes straight to judging my lifestyle while reading this post, that's ok.
I will be the first to admit that I am in no means perfect. The thing about perfection is that no one really is. Others may be better at something that we are not good at. They may have features that we long for, they may offer qualities that we are short of, but you have to think of it like this, not one person is the same. We are all wired differently. We have our own experiences, we react differently, yet our decisions mold our hearts. We make the wrong decisions in some situations, sometimes even knowingly, but the results of our decisions teach us something. And sometimes (with me) it takes a bunch of mistakes before the light bulb switches on and I really learn.
These times of difficulty in our life experiences are something that causes us to be broken. When we are broken this is good. (contrary to what you might think) I think that very fact is hard for me to swallow and realize especially in the moment of my brokeness. ( Please remember I get caught up with the day to day often, I don't stress much but I do stress about small or petty things and the reality is that I am so blessed) But when we are struggling and we think to ourselves "how am I going to deal with this?" ... "I've done all I can do in this situation, but nothing is changing".. "I just want to give up on hope"... - When those thoughts start to consume our minds, bodies, every move and begin to stress us out, when we are broken and it seems it would be easier to just ignore a situation, to turn your head and look the other way or to give up on hope that's when I automatically think " this is something I can't understand so I'm sure no one else will." I often forget that those very situations are when God longs for us to have faith in him. God just wants us to talk to him because he loves us. My mental outlook on the situation is usually that God is just like any other person. Man am I wrong (on many levels) God is so much greater than that.
What I often forget is:
God performs miracles in helpless situations.
God is bigger than our most hopeless and helpless situations and bigger than your broken heartedness and even most physical pain.
I have some worries that I've dealt with and I'll admit that I sometimes feel hopeless and helpless. Yesterday I was feeling very overwhelmed and consumed in my thoughts and worry. I just decided (finally) to take it to God. I prayed (and yes I do pray everyday, even if you might wonder if that was an action I did before yesterday) but this time I prayed amongst my brokeness. I cried and just put it all out on the table and you know what God said to me? God said " have a little faith in me Jeri Kaye, look to me, not at this situation going on."
I'm sharing this with you because I don't know if there is a crap load of things you are dealing with or if you are feeling overwhelmed or if your life is going awesome and you are as happy as can be on cloud nine, I guess I'm just writing this to you to remind you that God's love is constant and he longs for our hearts and wants us to have faith in these broken situations.
.. As I got done praying, I found written on a post it note in my handwriting 1 Peter 5:7. I looked that
verse up and as I read it with tears coming down my cheeks and chills on my arms this is what it said,
"Cast all your anxiety and worries on him because he cares for you."